You are standing in the middle of the Hennepin theatre district. A horde of ravenous audience members eyes you hungrily.

>VERBOSE

Maximum verbosity.

>TAKE INVENTORY

You are carrying:

a laptop
a copy of Joseph Campbell's "The Power of Myth"

>WRITE PLAY

I'm afraid you'll have to be more specific than that.

>ADAPT MYTH

You gleefully type up an adaptation of some obscure myth that nobody's ever heard of. It still seems to be missing something, though.

>ADD JOKES

You recklessly load the script down with juvenile, scatalogical humor. Much better.

>FEED SCRIPT TO AUDIENCE

That doesn't appear very appetizing. Perhaps if you put some actors in the script?

>PUT ACTORS IN SCRIPT

You don't see any actors here.

>CALL FRIENDS

You don't have any friends.

>CALL ACQUAINTANCES

They seem skeptical.

>BEG

They ignore you.

>THREATEN

The actors seem to be growing angrier!

>THREATEN SUICIDE

They reluctantly agree to join you. There are some actors here.

>PUT ACTORS IN SCRIPT

Done.

>FEED SCRIPT TO AUDIENCE

The script vanishes without a trace. The audience still appears to be hungry.

>FEED EGO TO AUDIENCE

The audience devours your ego.

>FEED DIGNITY TO AUDIENCE

The audience devours your dignity. They seem to have lost interest in you now.

>SCORE

You have scored 0 out of a possible 200 points, giving you the rank of Starving Artist.

>QUIT

Never!